The Ones I Need

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After the day’s work I go to bed. Think of all that has happened, all that is yet to happen, of all the people I know so far, of all the people who are today far off, of all the things that belong to me, of all the moments I enjoyed and wish if they could come back again, of all the dreams I behold in my eyes, of all the things that happened I never dreamt of and of all the things that really matter when I am alone. It is late in the night and its time I need to revive myself to face the challenges that are awaiting me tomorrow. Just as mysterious as the darkness prevailing in my room. I have lots of things to see, lot many of battles to be won. I see the moon behind the palm tree outside my window and slowly start closing my eyes. But the moonlight falls directly on my face. I then open my eyes and start staring at the moon. He seems so royal, so beautiful, and so happy.

I feel so lonely here, Neeraj!” he talks to me. I give him a smile. Never expecting such a beautiful thing to say this. Now I start looking at him fondly.

Why do you think so, buddy?” I ask him “You are the ruler of the sky at night. The sky is yours, the stars are yours. You can’t be lonely!”

I get up from my bed now. And go to the balcony. From there I could get a majestic view of the night. A faint fragrance of the moist soil enchants me. Every thing is so still. No leaf has even a slightest move. Seems like time has paused for this conversation.

“No!” the moon speaks in a soft voice. “It’s very lonely here at the top. The sky is so big and I am very far off from my stars. There are so many strangers around me but the ones I love, the ones I need are really far off. I am unhappy, I am so lonely!”

I come back to my bed. Unhappier than before. I start seeing the moon again. But this time he seems so unhappy, so paltry! I close my eyes and start thinking. Now I think of me. Only me! How lonely I am on this planet. There are lots of people around me. Strangers! Or the so called friends. But the ones I love, the ones I need are so far off.

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I Love You Mumbai!

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On my way towards the Elephanta Island from Mumbai - A majestic view of the Taj Hotel and Gateway of India

When I am with her, I ignore her
When she is near, I wish to be far off
When she smiles at me, I give her a frawn
When she loves me, I hate her
But! Donno why...
When I am away, I miss her!



Yeah! This is the effect Mumbai - the city of my dreams has on me. Greater than her greatness is my fascination for her! Now! an obvious question, why do I say I hate her? Well that's nothing but a natural human tendency to hate what we have and to love what we don't! The same is the case with me. I remember, many a times I just hated this city because of its pollution, traffic jams and ever increasing population. Just when you are away from all this you realize the impact it had in your life. The things that you just hated suddenly becomes a matter of so much so importance that you start missing it. And of course, a city like Mumbai where-in I was brought up, breathed for the last 22 years is not so easy to forget. Despite all the problems it has, Mumbai is an indivisible part of my life.

Nothing great to do today, I wished to visit each and every place in this city sitting here in Mangalore; places that were my favourite hangouts, the memory of which is simply hardcoded in my mind. No matter I am aware of each and every street of Navi Mumbai but it is a matter of great amazement to just wander around the streets of Mumbai and Navi Mumbai. Thanks to Google Earth for understanding my world and bringing up this great technology due to which I am now able to visit places just as quick as my thoughts.

This is my college where I completed my engineering studies. The most famous and the best engineering college in Navi Mumbai. Located in Nerul, Navi Mumbai just being the heart of Navi Mumbai. Each and every moment I had spent in the college is still evergreen in my mind. Everything seems like yesterday. Our famous college festival HORIZON which was an event of bliss for all of us is what I miss a lot. The Rock show and the informals was a matter of attraction for me.

Nerul Railway Station or the Nerul Airport as we called it :) just 10 minutes from the college was another hangout for most of us. I remember when we bunked lectures and went there to catch the train towards Vashi to catch the afternoon or evening movie show just to know the other day that our proxy attendance was caught! So good were those days. And every thing in Nerul still reminds all these things to me.


The Palm Beach Road where I used to test the UBound speed limits of my bike. Hardly could you find such a wide and smooth highway in the city. I remember the days when I drove at the speed of 100 kmph to my office at CBD-Belapur on this road. Absolutely no fear!! The palm beach road started at Vashi and ended at my previous office at CBD-Belapur.
Vashi is what we all think of when we think of Navi Mumbai. There are my numerous memories linked with it. The Railway station, the Center One shopping mall where we friends have our get togethers even today, the Meghraj cinema hall an usual hangout during the college days, Vashi Plaza building - the knowledge hub wellknown to have various coaching classes all under one roof and the time I used to spend on the Sanpada Railway Station to catch the train towards Airoli.

CBD-Belapur one of the nicest places in Navi Mumbai, the railway station of which could not be removed from my mind. The place is mostly known for its commercial offices and call centers. It was another bliss to walk or drive on the streets of Belapur. Thanks to CIDCO for building such a good layout and breath holding buildings at this place.
Thats just about Navi Mumbai - my home city but there are lot more of such Navi Mumbais which Mumbai has and which are very difficult to be described in one shot. I Love you Mumbai!

The Mumbai Skyline through my lens

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Whats wrong in IT?

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India’s sunshine industries or more specific the IT sector doubtlessly has a vast scope to grow for the years to come. With the ever increasing fame of the Information Technology and the service industries pertaining to it, every fresh graduate today dreams to occupy a respectable position in the industry. IT giants like TCS, Infosys and Wipro have already started hiring people from all education backgrounds. So it doesn’t really matter if you do not get admission to Computer Science or related streams. The basic idea is that these companies search for the real talent irrespective of their educational domain, hire them, train them and build them into professionals who can give the industry great returns. In turn the employee is rewarded with a much deserved respect and a fat salary the amount of which was not even thought of by his father when he was of his age.

Everything here looks fine, sounds great. But it’s not that easy owning a dignity and a handsome remuneration. There is a lot more to be analyzed that is hidden behind the scene. I have one of my roomies whom I meet only at the weekends. Just because he comes beyond 2 am and leaves at 7 am. We sleep in the same room but never see each other. Sometimes I meet him in the food-court or in the elevator. A weary body, a sleepless face with ungraceful eyes is what he seems to me. But he looks to be so contented by his work. He thinks this is his ladder to fulfill his dream, the dream to go onsite. Probably the difference in the IST and EST working hours force software engineers to wait and work for more than 14 hours a day. But that is not the only reason for long stretched working hours that I could think of. Employees are many times forced to work just to keep promises made to the customers. After all it is not only the customer satisfaction which the industry expects but it’s the ‘customer delight’ what it want for which it can make its employees walk an extra mile. In most of the cases this extra mile implies long working hours.

One of the persons hosting the technical excellence awards ceremony, while presenting the best employee award remarked, “He is the most excellent, diligent and hardworking persons in the company. When ever you come to office you will find him toiling on his laptop. He is the most deserving nominee for the award.”

Words like these encourage the practice of working till late hours and weaken the morale of other employees. Here I do not state that rewarding excellence is not a good practice but it does not necessarily mean that working beyond usual office hours means more work is done. Thus an excellent job done by an employee who works only for normal 8 hours a day becomes dim. I admit the fact that not all men are equal. Different men have different understanding and grasp over things. An employee who is not good in documentation might be a very good coder or vice versa. It’s not for how long you work but how good you work in your usual official time slot. If the company encounters an improper time estimation or lack of sufficient time for the promises being made to the customer, it should not make its employees force work beyond normal working hours. Here, the art of saying “No” would solve great problems and the current project statistics can be very well used to reframe the man hours required to quote estimates for future projects of similar nature.

The sector is rapidly growing with its diversified roots all over India or rather the world. It is quite natural that you will not get a job in Software Company in the same city where your family resides. A huge population working in this sector prefers to leave their homes and live in houses which are quite far from their dear ones. It is a matter of great prestige for their parents for their child being working in this respectable white-collared field. So much so that they don’t know what they are really missing in this course. Most people or rather colleagues I come across everyday seem so lost in their work that hardly could they realize that there is a world beyond their cubicle and projects. You ask them how a particular issue was resolved. They know it but never would they be able to answer questions that are irrelevant to their domain. The stress levels are so high that they seem lost in their own cave all the time. Neither could they enjoy their favorite sport nor a movie. Several stress management sessions and workshop prove futile over this. Most of the software engineers are normally below 25 and they could tolerate any kind of mental stress and physical stress caused to them. But the effects are not immediate. Senior officials have reportedly found suffering from physical disorders, back ailments and mental fatigue. A bulging stomach is not at all a new thing in them. It is simply because not even 10 percent of them ever think of things like exercising and physical fitness. Asked to most of them the excuse they give is that of heavy work load and busy time schedules.

No matter whatever you gain here, it is for sure that you loose more than you gain. After all we work for our betterment and a healthy future. We all are professionals, but just ask the human within you. How much time you devote for your family, to your hobbies, to your friends, to your girlfriend? You are someone’s son, someone’s brother may be someone else lifetime asset. Work, but do not loose your identity. I am happy that company has started analyzing employees who are in on time and who are out on time but still I wonder the foolproof ness of this initiative. It is not only the customers’ satisfaction but also employees’ welfare that a Software Company should be concentrating at. These are some serious issues and need to be handled in its initial phase before they could develop deep roots in our lives and make it a hell.

Just give a thought!

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Yet another attempt!

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After so many futile attempts of mine to understand a woman's mind I am currently exploring the New York Times best seller by Dr. John Gray - Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus. The book concentrates on the key aspects where the thoughts between men and women differ. The behaviour of both the sexes and the way they react to situations is as if they belong to two different planets. If men could understand the women's mind and vice versa then both could enjoy better life consisting of an everlasting love.

Sounds quite logical but I really don't know how far this could be practical. With all the females I have came across, I have experienced a huge differences in their opinions and the way of thinking. There is hardly any similarity I could relate among them. Nevertheless, many of the things here relate to the general features a woman most of which I have come across in my life. So it's not necessary that the things mentioned by Dr. Gray would exactly be that of your special one. You can give it a go but I am still adamant on the fact that women are impossible.

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The war between emotions and responsibilities

The following lines hit my inbox a few days back. The author is still unknown but I think this expresses the mindset of every Software Engineer living away from home. Moreover it also expresses the situation through which am personally going through now-a-days and thats a reason it finds a space in my blog.

It was raining heavily outside. Dark clouds gathered in the sky and nature was in its ominous best. I took a break from my work and went to the pantry to grab a cup of coffee. I had a sip and went near the window to see the rain pouring down heavily outside the glass structure. I was inside our huge office building, unruffled by even the fierceness of the nature. Through the heavy transparent glass, I could see a small girl trying to hold on to her umbrella which the wind was snatching away from her. I felt sorry for the girl, and was happy that I was not in a similar pathetic situation. Yes. I take pride for the fact that I am a software engineer. . I have everything which a common man would envy; money, status, respect, you name it I have it. I always wanted to be software professional and here I am, working for one of the best firms in the world. But then, am I really happy? Now, I could see an imprint of my palm on the other glass window, through which I reminisced my past, basked in the warmth of the sun shine.

My childhood was so much of fun. I vividly remember those rainy days, when I hugged my mother tightly during sleeping listening to all the stories told by her. Now, I have a big house here, but then it is just a house, not a home. My parents are pretty far away from me now. I have a cell phone to talk to them everyday, but then I really miss those dinners which I had with my family everyday. I could easily afford to taste all the different cuisines these days, but the best of food there, lack the love and affection which is present in the food prepared by my mother.

I threw a lavish party for my colleagues for my birthday, but then they would never replace the birthdays when my friends secretly brought a cake and at the end, half of the cake would have ended up on my face. The couple of hundred bucks that u save for a long period just to give a treat to your friends in the road side chat shop can never give the pleasure even after spending a few thousand bucks these days.

The scene of me crying and refusing to have dinner on the day when I fought with my best friend came to my mind. Today, she has gone far away from me, taking away my love and with it my life, but I am sitting and coding here with a false smile on my face. Everyday I meet new people, but then I long ceased to make a new friend.

It’s true that I have a lot of things now. I have a nice bed, but no time to sleep. Lots of money, but no friends to spend it with. The latest designer clothes, but a worn out body. Quite a few to flirt, but no one to love. Awards for technical excellence, but no reward for the crave for peaceful ambience. A confident demeanor, but a reluctant and apathetic mind. Full of rain, but no sunshine even in the farthest distance.

Now, I could see the small girl on the road enjoying in the rain with her umbrella firmly in her grip. She might not have all the comforts which I have, but then she has the innocence and fun which I lost a long time back. I have decided to come out of this false fantasy, even if it is at the expense of losing the tap of the software engineer. I am going to again enjoy my life. I am going to go out in the rain and play with the small kid now. I removed my tie, and went near my computer to shut it down. Just then, I saw a new mail alert in my mail box. I slowly opened outlook and I found a message from my manager with an attachment saying that there was a critical defect in the code and I have to fix it soon. I convinced myself that I am not going to get bogged down again by these pressures and stick to my decision. I ignored the mail and went to the rest room. After a couple of minutes, the software engineer in me came out, his shirt tucked in with the perfect tie knot, sat before the computer, and started typing,

XYZ,

I am looking into the defect and will send the patch files before EOD.

Regards,
Me.

This is a war! The war between emotions and responsibilites. Each one of us needs to tackle such situations oftenly. But choosing among the two - emotions and career, give preference to career. By this I do not mean to say that you have to be a professional all the time. Each one of us has a child within and there has to be. But never restrict yourself to just one aspect of life.
Do love your work but at the same time do remember yourself, your family, your friends and your feelings. They are always with you. After all these things denote your identity. Life goes on and so do your work. Keep enjoying every moment as it comes across. That’s life!

Out on a dream Island

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This weekend I had been to the St. Mary's Island - a heaven I encountered on this planet.

St. Mary's Isles are a group of small islands lying a little to the north of the port of Malpe 7 kms form Udupi. Vasco-da-Gama landed in 1498 on one of these islands which he called `EI Padron de Santa Maria'. It is from this that these islands got their present name. They are just a few scattered projections of rock rising out of the western or Arabian Sea around Malpe.

The northern-most island is about a square mile in area and not more than 250 yards in width. It has coconut gardens which make it the shadiest of all the islands and give it a true South Sea color. The island is noted for its famous basalt rocks which Kulkunda, where a large cattle fair is held at the time of the have crystallized into columns and split into hexagonal mosaic. Perhaps, this is the only spot in India where basaltic rocks show up such peculiar formation.It is a really geological monument and tourists heaven. Totally uninhabited, St Mary's has just a few coconut trees for vegetation but nonetheless there are quite a few things that one can do here. If you happen to the lazy type, you can spend relaxed moments watching the azure blue sea. And when it gets too hot, you can catch your proverbial 40 winks of sleep in those straw huts constructed by tour-operators. The hexagonal rocks in various shades: of black and red are certain to hypnotize the itinerant tourist and one can spend quite some time climbing the taller ones. You can put more than your big toe in lagoons created by these rocky outcrops. Or walk on the soft, sands with the waves gently caressing your feet. Adults and children often succumb to the pleasures of collecting seashells that litter certain stretches of the beach.

The islands hold out possibilities of being developed into a popular holiday resort.

Presenting some of the great moments I spent on this island :












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